A Sense of Doubt blog post #3590 - Reprint of Hey Mom #112 - Singing in the Car - "Washing of the Water" - Peter Gabriel - Music Monday for 2412.16

last full moon of 2024 - 2412.14

A Sense of Doubt blog post #3590 - Reprint of Hey Mom #112 - Singing in the Car - "Washing of the Water" - Peter Gabriel - Music Monday for 2412.16

Still in reprint mode and still publishing backwards from two days in the future.

I sang less in the car following Dad's death.

And yet, these songs of loss, grief, and pain are great for catharsis.

I found that I took solace from Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon shortly after Dad died. "Time" was the song I had to listen to.

Thanks for tuning in.

https://petergabriel.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/washing-of-the-water_Andy-Goldsworthy.jpg

https://petergabriel.com/video/washing-of-the-water/

Peter Gabriel - Washing of the Water

LOW POWER MODE: I sometimes put the blog in what I call LOW POWER MODE. If you see this note, the blog is operating like a sleeping computer, maintaining static memory, but making no new computations. If I am in low power mode, it's because I do not have time to do much that's inventive, original, or even substantive on the blog. This means I am posting straight shares, limited content posts, reprints, often something qualifying for the THAT ONE THING category and other easy to make posts to keep me daily. That's the deal. Thanks for reading.


Link to the original post reprinted below:

Monday, October 26, 2015

Hey, Mom! Talking to My Mother #112 - Singing in the car

me in my VW Rabbit- 1990s
yes, I already shared this photo, so what?

Hey, Mom! Talking to My Mother #112 - Singing in the car

Hi Mom,

I have not been singing in the car much in the last two decades and as such I listen to less music per week. I switched to audio books around 1999-2000. I don't have an accurate measure of exactly when I started listening to audio books but that's probably close. In fact, I have taken to listening to audio books when doing chores around the house or in the yard, doing dishes and kitchen clean up, walking the dog, on bike rides, and while driving. Pretty much, any time I can fill the void with an audio book, I do so.

But when you were actively dying, Mom, I abandoned my audio books and resumed my old habit of singing in the car as therapy to get me through the most intense grief as I was watching you die.

I used to sing in the car all the time. I remember when I first drove to Kalamazoo College for freshman orientation listening to Pink Floyd's The Wall on my brand new remote cassette player, as in it sat on the floor under the dash.

I used to keep a constant of stream of music going in my life, not just in the car. But in the 1990s, I found that I was obsessing a great deal about stupid crap. I was not singing along so much anymore, and I was not using the time in the car for something productive like thinking through story elements, characters, and content for the novel on which I was working. So, I discovered audio books. There was a little bit of a learning curve to train my mind to focus, and I still find my mind wanders from time to time (the paper copy of the book helps with this and I always keep it on hand to consult, review, and mark my place). As such, singing in the car became a rare thing. In the last few years, I have only really done it while traveling with Liesel.

But when you were dying, Mom, I took a two (maybe three) week hiatus from audio books, not that I could have concentrated anyway. I did a lot of singing. It was cathartic.

So, yesterday, my head was full of work stuff and I need emotional release. My current audio book is hardly gripping, so I decided to sing in the car on the way to teach in Benton Harbor. I sang for an hour, and it felt really good.

This reminded me of something my friend Glenn Codere proposed: seven songs in seven days and a description of what they mean to you. So, here goes.

I love Peter Gabriel. Many Peter Gabriel songs have helped me over the years, and I have sung them proudly, even dancing around my room as I cranked the volume. "The Washing of the Water" from his 1992 album Us quickly became one of my top five Peter Gabriel songs after its release.

I have used this song to navigate the deep trenches of many painful times in my life, but there's been no time more painful than your death, Mom. None of my break ups matches this pain, and so this song takes on new relevance and significance, especially the last line "bring me something to take this pain away."

Peter Gabriel ~ Washing of the Water (New Blood Version)

Readers who are here, if you have never read the lyrics, READ THEM as you listen to the song. Let me share all that with you, Mom. So beautiful...

Peter Gabriel's "Washing of the Water" Lyrics

River, river, carry me on
Living river, carry me on
River, river, carry me on
To the place where I come from

So deep, so wide, will you take me on your back for a ride
If I should fall, would you swallow me deep inside
River, show me how to float, I feel like I'm sinking down
Thought that I could get along

But here in this water, my feet won't touch the ground
I need something to turn myself around
Going away, away toward the sea
River deep, can you lift up and carry me
Oh roll on through the heartland
'Til the sun has left the sky
River, river, carry me high

'Til the washing of the water, make it all alright
Let your waters reach me, like she reached me tonight

Letting go, it's so hard, the way it's hurting now
To get this love untied
So tough to stay with this thing, cos if I follow through
I face what I denied
I'll get those hooks out of me
And I'll take out the hooks that I sunk deep in your side
Kill that fear of emptiness, that loneliness I hide

River, oh river, river running deep
Bring me something that will let me get to sleep

In the washing of the water will you take it all away
Bring me something to take this pain away

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Have someone give you a kiss, and tell you that I love you.
Talk to you tomorrow, Mom.
- Days ago = 114 days ago
- Bloggery committed by chris tower - 1510.26 - 20:10
and again - 1510.27 - 8:55
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- Bloggery committed by chris tower - 2412.16 - 10:10

- Days ago: MOM = 3454 days ago & DAD = 110 days ago

- New note - On 1807.06, I ceased daily transmission of my Hey Mom feature after three years of daily conversations. I post Hey Mom blog entries on special occasions. I post the days since ("Days Ago") count on my blog each day, and now I have a second count for Days since my Dad died on August 28, 2024. I am now in the same time zone as Google! So, when I post at 10:10 a.m. PDT to coincide with the time of Mom's death, I am now actually posting late, so it's really 1:10 p.m. EDT. But I will continue to use the time stamp of 10:10 a.m. to remember the time of her death and sometimes 13:40 EDT for the time of Dad's death. The blog entry numbering in the title has changed to reflect total Sense of Doubt posts since I began the blog on 0705.04, which include Hey Mom posts, Daily Bowie posts, and Sense of Doubt posts. Hey Mom posts will still be numbered sequentially. New Hey Mom posts will use the same format as all the other Hey Mom posts; all other posts will feature this format seen here.