|Mother's Day 1976|
Happy Mother's Day. This is our second Mother's Day without you, Mom.
When putting this blog together, I actually went looking for both 2016 entries and 2015 entries. This is how time obfuscates memory. I caught my error quickly enough. You died on July 4th, 2015 at 10:10 a.m., and so there would not be a 2015 entry. I actually spent time with you while you were still alive on Mother's Day 2015. You weren't even actively dying yet, but you were declining.
I have been wanting to write about how I have moved on in regards to grief, Mom. Sure, I am still grieving, but it's not constant and it's not crippling. I am concerned that readers will think that by continuing my HEY MOM series that I am holding on, clinging, obsessed, looking for sympathy.
Not the case.
My loss, losing you, Mom, is not more unique than all the others who have lost parents, loved ones, and far less tragic than losses of young children.
But loss is loss, and measuring one loss against another seems like splitting hairs. It may serve a good purpose in validating someone's loss -- say of a young adult after his first semester at college as a friend of mine experienced late last year -- but not really useful in other ways. Because loss is loss, and we must all learn to live with it because we will lose people. It's inevitable.
I thought I had something more prosaic and heart-felt for Mother's Day last year, but apparently I went with short comments on some photos in a trilogy of posts and then a follow-up Throwback Thursday.
Here's the links to those. I would rather present them this way than my usual re-publishing of the content.
Hey, Mom! Talking to My Mother #304 - Mother's Day Trilogy Part One
Hey, Mom! Talking to My Mother #305 - Mother's Day Trilogy Part Two
Hey, Mom! Talking to My Mother #306 - Mother's Day Trilogy Part Three
Hey, Mom! Talking to My Mother #310 - Mother's Day 2010 - Throwback Thursday
Instead of prosaic and sentimental ruminations here, beyond what I have already written, I will instead add to the very first entry with an update about moving on.
I am still sad sometimes.
I grieve, Mom.
But I am living life and enjoying life and that's what you would want me to do.
And I know that because I hear you tell me with that voice in my head in a thousand ways throughout the year.
Here's the permanent dedicated link to my first Hey, Mom! post and the explanation of the feature it contains.
But I will share a photo gallery because pictures speak volumes.
|Christmas with grand parents Tower 1975|
|My birthday January 1969|
|Scout trip March 11 1972 Planetarium Kalamazoo|
|Me and Mom - Hazelwood - pregnant with Lori - I am 7.5 yrs|
|church photo 1974|
|Long Lake - 1971|
|Lori's birthday August 1971|
|Mom's birthday 1970|
|Mom 1962 - me 3.5 months|
|Mom's at Dad's 50th bday - 1985|
Reflect and connect.
Have someone give you a kiss, and tell you that I love you.
I miss you so very much, Mom.
Talk to you tomorrow, Mom.
- Days ago = 679 days ago
- Bloggery committed by chris tower - 1705.14 - 10:10 (my time)
NOTE on time: When I post late, I had been posting at 7:10 a.m. because Google is on Pacific Time, and so this is really 10:10 EDT. However, it still shows up on the blog in Pacific time. So, I am going to start posting at 10:10 a.m. Pacific time, intending this to be 10:10 Eastern time. I know this only matters to me, and to you, Mom. But I am not going back and changing all the 7:10 a.m. times. But I will run this note for a while. Mom, you know that I am posting at 10:10 a.m. often because this is the time of your death.