A Sense of Doubt blog post #3455 - Writing in Counseling Studies - Part One

Me Barista Portland Alberta St Portland 1805_19

A Sense of Doubt blog post #3455 - Writing in Counseling Studies - Part One

I have started a graduate program in Clinical Mental Health Counseling.

I plan to share many of my writings in my classes here on my blog.

Here's the first two.

Thanks for tuning in.

FIRST ASSIGNMENT
This reflection below on procrastination and other issues is pretty clear without the assignment prompt.

Procrastination is an often misunderstood function of the human mind. Not all of what gets labeled as procrastination is bad. As explained in Dr. Devon Price’s article “Laziness Does Not Exist” (published on Medium originally and later as a book) that we as a culture define productivity exclusively as an extension of our “work” (career) or practical industry (school, family chores, etc.) (Price, 2018), and procrastination is the avoidance of that productive industry. However, even a nap can be productive if one needs a nap and such a thing then helps one to be able do these traditionally productive things later in the day, then more rested and refreshed. As someone who has worked from home at least half-time throughout my career, work-life balance has been crucial to maintaining my mental wellness and overall health. After working a sufficient amount of time each day, ending the work day to engage in self-care activities has been critical to my happiness and self-worth. However, I suspect this question intends to solicit a response like “procrastination has not benefitted me.” I am a big proponent of getting an early start on any work that I have to do as much as possible, as evidenced by how I wrote this before the Monday July 8th start of the semester. After years of procrastination as task avoidance, I have learned to set priorities and get done the things that have to get done in the best order.

Like Tim Urban explains in his TED Talk “Inside the Mind of a Master Procrastinator,” I had the very same experience in which I stayed up for 72 hours straight to complete 125 pages of writing:

“...with three days until the deadline, still not having written a word, and so I did the only thing I could: I wrote 90 pages over 72 hours...humans are not supposed to pull two all-nighters” (Urban, 2016, 01:27). And so, I have learned that if I put off work for the graduate program, I am less likely to be successful: All in balance,  priorities, wise choices, work-life balance, self-care. Fortunately, given my current work load, I will have 2-3 work week days at home to devote lots of time to my graduate school work.

The disposition of engagement is vital for professionals in the field of counseling for processing information, self-directed learning, and self-care to ensure quality care of clients. Norma S. Guerra of the University of Texas wrote of the LIBRE model in the Journal of Employment Counseling; LIBRE stands for Listen, Identify, Brainstorm, Reality Test, Encourage (Guerra, 2007). Though all five of these actions are crucial to being a successful counselor, active listening is possibly the first and most important skill. I talk with my own therapist frequently about staying engaged with clients, as I think it would be challenging to stay focused and keep one’s mind from wandering. As an introvert (INXP) and an Individualist (Enneagram), my mind tends to wander the wilderness of Imagination quite often, and is something I will have to be mindful of as a counselor. 

Along with active listening, being self-directed learner will aid me both in becoming and in serving as a counselor. Rashid and Asghar propose in an article in Elsvier, “technology improves student learning” and engagement. Students develop life-long learning skills by becoming self-directed learners, which rely on strong engagement (Rashid & Asghar, 2016, p. 610). And for the third importance of engagement, a counselor will have difficulty advocating for clients to practice good self-care without practicing it themselves. Though Stevens, Williams, and Dowd wrote their article for counselors in training in Ohio, but the advice surely applies to all: “Counselors and counselors-in-training (CITs) are responsible for supporting the

well-being and mental health of their clients, and self-care is critical in ensuring quality care” (Stevens et al. 2020). I already model the advice for which these authors advocate with the focus on proper self-care. As Dr. Oswin mentioned in her Week One video, the expectation is that I am an imperfect counselor now and will continue to be one for years to come. 

Good self-care through self-directed learning and active listening as well as other aspects of LIBRE are ways to remain engaged and to grow as an imperfect counselor who is evolving. I know how to manage any tendencies to procrastinate to remain on track and be successful in my learning and my practice.

References

Guerra, N. S. (2007). LIBRE model: engagement styles in counseling. Journal of Employment Counseling, 44(1), 2–10. https://doi.org/10.1002/j.2161-1920.2007.tb00019.

Price, Devon. (2018). Laziness Does Not Exist. Medium: Human Parts, Medium Corporation. humanparts.medium.com/laziness-does-not-exist-3af27e312d01. 

Rashid T. and Asghar H.M. (2016). Technology use, self-directed learning, student engagement and academic performance: Examining the interrelations. 63(1), 604-612, https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2016.05.084.

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0747563216304204.

Stevens, M. M., Williams, A. E., & Dowd, S. E. (2020). Motivation, Perceptions, and Engagement Related to Participation in Personal Counseling Among Master’s Level Counselors-in-Training in Ohio. Journal of Counselor Practice, 11(1), 85–106. https://doi.org/10.22229/cou1112020

Urban, T. (2016, February). Inside the mind of a master procrastinator: Tim Urban: TED2016. TED Conferences. https://www.ted.com/talks/tim_urban_inside_the_mind_of_a_master_procrastinator?language=en

I disliked this activity. The Impartiality part focused on these pictures.

Awareness: Bridge the Gap

1. How have inconsistencies between how you view yourself and others’ experiences of you created problems for you in the past?

People in my life – mostly my therapist and my wife – keep me focused on growing and evolving how I am perceived versus how I feel I am conveying myself, my thoughts, and feelings. My wife will always point out how my tone, my facial expression, and/or my body language reveal a great discrepancy between my intentions and how I perceive my actions and how I am perceived. I hear this feedback less often in the work-place, so either my colleagues and students (I am a teacher) are too kind to say anything or my wife is ultra-sensitive, though this does not mean she is wrong or hyperbolic. The exercise is useful as a thought process, but it’s all based on my reality, rather than having someone else fill out the second part in how others perceive me. For instance, I scored blunt and bossy very low, though perhaps I am seen that way more than I realize. I have learned valuable lessons in the past about being bossy when I delegate tasks and then micro-managing due to my own anxiety. I am better now at letting people be and allowing them to work at their own pace. My greatest gap scores individually were scores of two; some of these reveal vulnerabilities, such as I do not believe everyone realizes how sensitive and trusting I am, and this vulnerability has caused me a great deal of pain and/or anxiety in the past. Other scores, such as the gap in discourteous, measure my fears about how I am perceived. I am very sensitive to avoiding being offensive.

2. How can you adjust your own self-perception to consider the experiences of others in your professional life?

Something that I have worked to change for years is the deeply-rooted mind-set that everyone has to like that derives from a childhood experiencing bullying and believing few people liked me. This feeling is something to change in my self-perception, and it touches on multiple elements rated in this gap exercise. As a teacher, it is not possible to be liked by all one’s students. Likewise, as a counselor some potential clients may decide that I am not the right therapist for them and move on, much like some students make the same choice and drop my class. I always struggle to not take those decisions personally. As a teacher, I have often reached out to see if there is something I can change about the course or myself to avoid other students dropping for the same reason. Often the reason they drop is their own and has little or nothing to do with me or the workload in my course. Likewise, I would hope that as a counselor in training I will have some wise supervisors to help guide me to improve when confronted with shortcomings identified by clients. I already discuss this issue with my therapist who is immensely helpful in helping me to understand what experiences of others to take seriously and use to adapt myself, my approach, my mind-set and what feedback is not helpful, cases when those perceptions are inaccurate, based on a misunderstanding, or of either projection or transference. I can work to alleviate misunderstandings by improving the clarity of my own communication. Projection or transference may be a longer project, if and only id the client stays in my care, though I may consider how my actions may contribute to one of those psychological conditions.

3. How can you adjust how you are experienced by others?

I am always analyzing and checking in with people on how I am perceived. Was that comment rude? Did I talk too much? Do I seem dismissive? Was relating my own experience in that situation inappropriate? All these questions and more. I take the feedback I receive seriously; I do not reject it. When I have asked for feedback and get some that upsets me, I spend a lot of time questioning why the feedback upsets me. Is it because the feedback is wrong or am I being defensive because the feedback is right, and I do not want to face that reality? Likewise, I am aware that like all humans I am a creature of denial, hypocrisy, and complex rationalization. I am always monitoring my actions, beliefs, feelings, and attitudes to try to uncover truths about which I am in denial, ways in which I am a hypocrite (though it’s impossible to not be a hypocrite in some ways in the modern world), and ways I rationalize when I should not. I will continue this self-analysis even more extensively as a counselor.

Impartiality: Burning Buildings

1. What thoughts, feelings, or reactions came up for you during this exercise?

I know I have deeply-rooted and unconscious prejudices that I am still working to make conscious and eliminate. I know I can make assumptions about people just based on how they look; assumptions that I know often prove to be wrong.

2. What surprised you about yourself during this exercise?

I am not really surprised at all as I have done a similar training of this kind before. Maybe what surprised me most is that I like to fool myself into thinking I have grown, even though I am still uncomfortable with some of these choices in regards to some of these people based on what might be erroneous assumptions.

3. What was difficult for you about this exercise?

What is most difficult for me is the burning building question. I have grappled with similar questions in other training exercises, and these questions offend me. In a burning building, if I am being a hero, I am going to grab whomever I can based on where the fire has spread and who is closest to the exit. Some people are not reachable and that will not be my fault. Whether they are rescued has nothing to do with what they look like. I am surely not walking past the man who appears homeless to rescue the one who looks like a gay black man because I am gay. That’s just stupid.

4. What was easy for you about this exercise?

What is easiest for me is being asked to be impartial in letting some people into my home or my family as well as entering their home or joining their family. I try to remain open-minded until I know more about a human. I try not to make assumptions and judgement based on how they look, though I know that I am very good at fooling myself into thinking I am being open when deep in my heart I am not.

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- Bloggery committed by chris tower - 2408.03 - 10:10

- Days ago = 3319 days ago

- New note - On 1807.06, I ceased daily transmission of my Hey Mom feature after three years of daily conversations. I plan to continue Hey Mom posts at least twice per week but will continue to post the days since ("Days Ago") count on my blog each day. The blog entry numbering in the title has changed to reflect total Sense of Doubt posts since I began the blog on 0705.04, which include Hey Mom posts, Daily Bowie posts, and Sense of Doubt posts. Hey Mom posts will still be numbered sequentially. New Hey Mom posts will use the same format as all the other Hey Mom posts; all other posts will feature this format seen here.