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Sunday, June 20, 2021

A Sense of Doubt blog post #2315 - In the Bat Cave, the Elevators Only Go UP- Comic Book Sunday - Father's Day edition



A Sense of Doubt blog post #2315 - In the Bat Cave, the Elevators Only Go UP- Comic Book Sunday - Father's Day edition


I interrupt my so far sort of weekly WHAT AM I READING to present some breaking news from a Harley Quinn cartoon TV show for adults that I did not know existed in which DC Comics declared, as canon, that Batman does not perform oral sex.

I was going to comment, but I am not sure I can add anything to the Twitter messages and the article below.

DC has a history of misogyny, so this "Batman does not go downtown" was no real surprise, just more of the five steps backwards for every two steps forward that is our world now.

It's gross.

And it is Father's Day. This is such a great lesson for Father's Day in how not to be a selfish lover.

Okay, word.

WORD.







































https://therealbatmanchronologyproject.com/blog/a-quick-list-batmans-sex-life/

Batman Chronicles #9 by Devin Grayson, Duncan Fegredo, & Lee Loughridge (1997)


https://primaryignition.com/2017/01/09/a-batman-14-review-they-totally-had-sex/



https://bleedingcool.com/comics/fight-catwoman-batman-whole-lives-batman-annual-2-spoilers/





DC Comics HEREBY ORDERS Batman Be Crappy At Sex

Stephen Robinson
June 15, 2021 02:35 PM

Everyone's all up in Bruce Wayne's bat business after the co-creator of HBO Max's "Harley Quinn" series claimed that DC Comics has very specific opinions about Batman's sex life.

"Harley Quinn" is an adult animated series starring Kaley Cuoco (who's AMAZING). It's an adult comedy with graphic violence and sexual shenanigans. It's TV-MA with the full nasty. DC is usually pretty supportive, according to creator Justin Halpern, but the company drew a hard line when it came to a scene between Batman and Catwoman, both of whom are fictional characters.

"It's incredibly gratifying and free to be using characters that are considered villains because you just have so much more leeway," said Halpern. "A perfect example of that is in this third season of Harley [when] we had a moment where Batman was going down on Catwoman. And DC was like, 'You can't do that. You absolutely cannot do that.' They're like, 'Heroes don't do that.' So, we said, 'Are you saying heroes are just selfish lovers?' They were like, 'No, it's that we sell consumer toys for heroes. It's hard to sell a toy if Batman is also going down on someone.'"

Say what? Heroes don't go downtown? It's all missionary with one swashbuckler boot firmly on the floor? Full disclosure, the Catwoman in "Harley Quinn" is an Eartha Kitt-looking sister, voiced by the stunning Sanaa Lathan. This is not a Catwoman who tolerates vanilla. The integrity of the series demands that Batman get busy on Catwoman's furry places.

This is actually weirder than when comics publishers insisted that Superman and Batman never had sex, supposedly so they'd have something in common with their fans. Dean Cain, star of the 1990s “Lois & Clark" series, explained at the time why he thought his character was a virgin.

"He had had the opportunity [to have sex] and he's thought about it," the actor reasons, "but he is the most moral guy on Earth and he decided that he would save himself for his special person."

That's certainly Clark Kent's choice but it's not what makes him a hero. It's all the saving of lives. Besides, shouldn't he have tested that super dick before his wedding night? I don't mean to be prejudiced but he is an alien. He should have sex for the first time with a human woman in a controlled laboratory environment, like the one at Madonna's house.

Superman grew up in Kansas, so he's capable of anything. However, no one seriously believed the goddamn Batman was chaste. His alter ego is a "billionaire playboy." I remember reading some bizarre theory that Bruce Wayne paid women he dated to claim they had sex, which would have created its own set of rumors. Batman as Rock Hudson is very 1950s.

In 2011, DC Comics published an actual comic, one freely available to kids, where Batman and Catwoman fucked themselves stupid. It's no longer playful innuendo. It's in every room and on every surface.

DC Comics

So, the objection isn't that Batman and Catwoman have sex outside of the bonds of matrimony. DC won't accept Batman giving a woman oral pleasure. This is how DC tells us it's run by men without telling us it's run by men. Someone actually opened his mouth and said, "It's hard to sell a toy if Batman is also going down on someone." You know Halpern's telling the truth because it's just too bonkers a statement to make up. As someone who owns a lot of Batman-related toys that I let my son look at and even touch on special occasions, I guarantee that I'd buy the fuck out of a "Harley Quinn" Batman figure with oral sex action. If DC is so worried about selling toys, they should get some therapy and then get to work on that "Harley Quinn" toy line. It's been almost two years. Where's my goddamn Sanaa Lathan Catwoman?

Before I go, I also want to clear up some slander about my boy Adam West. You can mock the 1960s “Batman" series if you want (just not in my presence), but West fucked around for real during the series run. He even got kicked out of an orgy with Frank Gorshin, who played the Riddler.

WEST: We walked in and it was an orgy. So I immediately went into the Batman character, and Frank went into the Riddler character, because we were getting the big giggles. It was so funny to us, what we walked into. And we were kicked out. We were expelled from the orgy.

Folks on social media claim that West's Batman was the least likely to go down on Catwoman, which is absurd. We're talking about Julie Newmar here. The only obstacle was Robin. Catwoman doesn't step-mom.

And West's Batman would've definitely taken the scenic route with Lee Meriwether's Catwoman. As the man said, “What use is a dream if not a blueprint for courageous action!" That ... actually doesn't make a lot of sense, but the Bat-Brain was focused on other things.

[Complex]

Follow Stephen Robinson on Twitter.

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- Bloggery committed by chris tower - 2106.20 - 10:10

- Days ago = 2179 days ago

- New note - On 1807.06, I ceased daily transmission of my Hey Mom feature after three years of daily conversations. I plan to continue Hey Mom posts at least twice per week but will continue to post the days since ("Days Ago") count on my blog each day. The blog entry numbering in the title has changed to reflect total Sense of Doubt posts since I began the blog on 0705.04, which include Hey Mom posts, Daily Bowie posts, and Sense of Doubt posts. Hey Mom posts will still be numbered sequentially. New Hey Mom posts will use the same format as all the other Hey Mom posts; all other posts will feature this format seen here.
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